Good Bye 2010... Welcome 2011...

The new year is shy of around 7 hours.

What a year 2010 was.

I made some resolutions exactly 1 year ago.

I did some review on it. I did not fare well.

I do not have big plans for this new year.

Just hope.

For in hoping, there is unlimited avenues to achieve, to feel and to enjoy.

Welcome 2011.

Need to logoff. Going to church.

My trip to Jordan

I must confess that I am posting this trip after a long period of 6 months.. This trip happened during the summer.

When the plane touched Queen Alia International airport, I wondered finally. Its been a long time living in Middle east and I always wanted to visit a country like Jordan (Lebanon and Syria are other countries on the list). After completing all formalities, I came out of the airport. My pickup was waiting outside. Suddenly a gush of cool breeze swept my face. I shivered. Though the temperature at the airport was well over 30 degrees, I was feeling cold, for I was coming from Bahrain where the temperatures topped 45 degrees. I wondered what would my relatives living in Kuwait would feel (there it is over 55 degrees)?
I reached the hotel. The room was a suite and the view was sweet. This hotel is on a slope and I could see west side of Amman from my room. I slept and later woke up at 5. I was hungry and went out. Nearby was Sweifieh Avenue Mall which housed Carrefour express. I got some necessities and walked back. I had some food and watched football match. Later at around 7:30, I looked out of my room. It was not even dusk yet. At about 8 pm, got frustrated, took my camera and started shooting the waning sun light and its effect on Amman. By 8:20, the sun set.
I guess one of the after effects of staying in Jordan is that sun sets late, I sleep late and yet I have to wake up early. I had some sleepless nights and my mood was out of the world.

The Hope - Chariots of Fire

In Chariots of Fire, there are 2 protagonists. Both are sprinters, however both have different goals. Harold Abraham runs the race in order to prove that he is like any English man. Eric Liddell runs for the glory of God.

Towards the last, we see the Harold who just before the final 100 m race, stretching in his room. During the scene where he speaks to his friend and after that, there is a palpable sense of tension within him. Of course he needs to prove that he is the best and this is the Olympics that occurs once in 4 years. Therefore it is a make or break situation, no wonder it is difficult for him.

However, Eric was happy, went to church and was enjoying every moment. He, even at the last moment kept his cool. Why? Because he trusted in the Lord. He was running for the glory of God, and if God wants him there, He will get him there.

So he ran. And won the gold medal with a new world record.

Now as I remember my past, I just imagine that, if I work according to God's plan and submit myself to Him, I would be able to see the right path and then understand in His terms what victory should be for me.

I hope for the very best.

Trivia:

The film is named Chariots of Fire based on the poem by William Blake. The poem is also a hymn called Jerusalem which is sung in the film also. You may note the following verse interesting:

I will not cease from Mental Fight,

Nor shall my Sword sleep in my hand:

I will not cease from Mental fight is equivalent to having hope.

The Tension

Before you have something to do important, something that can change your life forever; you get nervous and tensed. This is because your actions can change your destiny.
It can be a decision making process like the moment you say yes to a proposal, the moment you take an entrance exam / standardized exam etc.
These are the stepping stones to your future; these are the ones that define your future.

I, in my younger years used to have peer pressure for my final year exams of 10th grade and 12th grade.
This is the typical scenario in India at least, where parents and relatives tell, scold or finally yell at you telling that this is an important event for you.
But then, I was young, to understand the rationale behind it.

Now I am older enough to understand my situation, it dawns on me how important this makes or break events can be.
Now I am bearing the heat of it.
It is so evident.
I am actually crushed not by the event, but the forethought of it.
Gosh, this is killing me.

"Hope is a dangerous word, it can drive a man insane"

I was relying on hope.

I fell down and did not know whether I will get up.

I prayed to God for hope and He gave me in abundance.

I again fell down, looking at my opportunity lost, but I realized I was not in pain.

Because I had hope and that kept me alive.

I fell down again.

I brooded for some time. Then I got up.

This was because of hope.

Hope kept me alive.

I realized that I have more avenues to look upon for what I am searching than rather waste my time grumbling upon my lost opportunity.

As I walked through the streets of Hoora ( Bahrain), a thought just flashed across my mind.

Am I addicted to Hope???

As Red said in The Shawshank redemption: "Hope is a dangerous word, it can drive a man insane"

Am I on the brink on insanity. Or am I keeping hope.

Hope is a gift from God.

Denying there is hope is a sin.

Just thinking about the hope that I have and where it will lead me.